install theme
simple makeup today. now, someone bring me coffee. 
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I’m only gonna say this once:

Three days ago I innocently posted a photo of me putting my halloween costume together, a black cat to be precise. Now, 4,000 reblogs later, I’m pretty much up to my ears in comments, emails, etc. 

This is the thing, it’s none of your concern or anyone eles’s what I weigh, if I’m active or not, etc. Thats what people are missing here. I eat healthy AND I’m very active. I’m a full time model, mother, makeup artist, AND I train 3 days a week on top of working at an office job. I have NO health conditions, and am perfectly fine per my physician. (& even if I wasn’t, it’s none of YOUR concern) All of these ‘assumptions’ that I’m unhealthy is super ridiculous and frankly NO ONE’S business. Don’t say that it’s “coming out of your pay" because I’m so fucking fat paying for my insurance or whatever garbage you think to be the truth. I pay for my own insurance from my THREE jobs that I work. I am more active than 80% of my friends who are all under 150lbs, and while they are home doing whatever, I’m spending my evenings walking 3 miles or more for exercise. However, would anyone know that? Better yet, do you actually think that the people saying anything, especially the person who started all of this care? Hell no. They have such a distorted view of reality and what they perceive to be “healthy” that no matter what I say, or you, they will still live in their little body shaming “healthy is skinny” bubble. 

I will continue to keep speaking out against turds who body shame, who feel it necessary to ‘help us’ or point out the obvious. Yes, I get it, I’m fat..call the police!! What about all of the self righteous people who are talking crap? Why is it okay to be a complete jerk?! To my shock, some of you actually think that I was ‘too mean’ to her, which is laughable. Why do I have to turn head and pretend that she didn’t completely be little me and then justify it by saying ‘well you put yourself out there, so I give my opinion’. Just because it’s the internet doesn’t mean that you get to be a bully, and that’s what it is, A BULLY. If your mothers didn’t teach you something, I’m going to school you now:

IF YOU CAN’T SAY SOMETHING NICE, DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL. 

Being mean for the sake of your own conscious will get you no where. I do what I do because you have to love yourself from the inside out, so that WHEN/IF you choose to lose weight you don’t have a distorted body image of yourself. People think that you can just lose weight and it will fix everything, but it doesn’t.  So say what you want, email me your ‘concern’s, and I will kindly ignore it all. To all of the support, love, and amazing people I have met through all of this, THANK YOU! You guys rock. 

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Goodnight Moon.
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I will never let anyone make me feel less than amazing because I am fat. You shouldn’t either. Fat is NOT a negative term, and I refuse to give anyone power over me because of 3 letters. I am taking back that word & sticking it on my FAT ass.
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Watching Harry Potter & daydreaming of being at Hogwarts…
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Moving soon..

As most of you know from reading my newest blog post. I am scared..and unsure what to think and feel most days. I feel like my life is going from eating filet mignon to top ramen. I am trying to look on the bright side of things, & focus on what I will gain.. Instead of what I am loosing…but even thats not easy.

Perhaps, I will look back on all of this one day and laugh, but right now, I want to cry. The only thing I am really forfitting is comfort, but I know deep down I am gaining so much more… My dignity.

You all say I inspire you, & for some of you, have changed your life. However, I am so inspired by your strengths, & am remembering that on days like today put’s a smile on my tired face.

So now, I am only asking one thing: keep me in your prayers, thoughts, meditations, etc. I know that I will get through the fire, but sometimes you need the help of your friends. sigh

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goooood mornin’ ya’ll!
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One of my favorite photos.. & two of my favorite things:

Red Lips & Big Hips.
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I heart the screensavers on Mac’s!
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Good Morning beauties!
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only 5 more days until I get my roots done & my hair cut. Thaaaank god.

I have felt like a hot mess lately.

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Geez Louise I love my new hair color!
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I am gonna be a busy bee today!

I have a hair appt this morning, then a fitting with Pin Up Girl Clothing, & Diiiiiisneyland with my boo Xanthia!!! Cant wait!!

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